In my previous post about the most common facebook friend requesting sin I always see people make, I mentioned that I would eventually share how to effectively write the personal message in your friend request to increase the likelihood that the person on the receiving end will quickly accept to help you start building a powerful facebook network.
If you remember in the post linked above, I was highlighting that those who do not use personal messages in their friend requests are shooting themselves in the foot, and are leaving a ton of money on the table long term.
Not only that, but even worse, they are probably being ignored on purpose, as I also illustrated and shared what I typically do with the friend requests I receive who don’t put a personal message.
Here is the exact formula to use when crafting your message when you send a friend request to someone in facebook to give it a fighting chance to rise above the clutter helping you quickly create lasting relationships.
Part 1: Introduce Yourself
“Hi John my name is Scott”
Why put this?
It is important to note that by putting the person’s first name at the first part of your message, it lets them know psychologically that you took the time to write the message instead of copying and pasting it to other requests that you sent out.
Part 2: Tell Them Where and How You Found Them
“Hi John my name is Scott, I found you after seeing you reply to one of my friends facebook status updates, and I really enjoyed what you had to say about the recent changes in google.”
“Hi John my name is Scott. My friend Terry mentioned to me you were definitely someone worth connecting to.”
Why put this?
It is important to note that after letting people know your name, and then sharing with them how you found them, your friend request has context in the other persons mind, and has a way of letting the other person know you aren’t some creep with a secret agenda or scrupulous plan. Just make sure what you put is in alignment with what you want to send out.
Part 3: Connect With Them on Some Level To Build Rapport Quickly
“Hi John my name is Scott. My friend Terry mentioned to me that you were definitely someone worth connecting to, and I see from your profile you are interested in internet marketing and online business. I am passionate about these two things as well as I have my own company in the same niche!“
“Hi John my name is Scott. My friend Terry mentioned to me that you were definitely someone worth connecting to, and I see from your profile picture that you have two children. I love kids and plan on having 5 after getting married but I am not quite there yet!“
Why put this?
When you add the personalized touch in your friend request, it shows the other person that you are in fact real, and are actually interested in getting to know them as the person they are. Sharing something personal about you before they share something personal about them is the name of the game to ensure the highest likelihood that they accept your request quickly!
Part 4: Ask a Question and Close it Out
“Hi John my name is Scott. My friend Terry mentioned to me that you were definitely someone worth connecting to, and I see from your profile you are interested in internet marketing and online business. I am passionate about these two things as well as I have my own company in the same niche! How long have you been in business and what do you like most about what you do? I look forward to your reply.
Why put this?
By closing your friend request out with a question it gives those individuals that you are sending a request to the opportunity to reach out to you to continue the conversation further. Plus one thing to also note is that if you have ever read “How To Win Friends and Influence People” Dale Carnegie states that people always love talking about themselves, so by doing this you are giving them the opportunity to talk first before they ask you what it is that you do.
Now don’t get discouraged!
If they don’t respond, they just aren’t that serious or have a VA managing it for them…which is their loss in my opinion. Keep putting out the value and the cream will rise to the top.
Here is the best part…
Of those who do respond, you will be amazed at how fast you can start to build rapport with them immediately!
I have story after story where I have done this like clockwork over and over again. Sometimes it leads to an immediate phone conversation, and for other requests I send it leads to new clients.
Quick Tip: Make sure you have your facebook profile positioned in an appropriate manner with a clear call to action for those who visit it for the first time. There is a high likelihood that when you send a new friend request to someone, and they don’t initially know you, the first thing they will do is look at your facebook profile. If it is not up to “snuff” or positioned properly, you can kiss any potential business from that person goodbye!
In the end the only thing you can control is the action that you take, the way you position yourself and who you choose to add as a friend. In taking this specific action of sending requests with custom personalized messages, have faith that it will work as you continue to look for the right people to add to your facebook network.
In a future post I will be sharing with you the exact process I follow after individuals accept my request, ensuring that the connection that is created continues to evolve over time…leading to referrals, new clients and more close friends than I know what to do with. So subscribe to the RSS feed if you haven’t already, so you don’t miss out on the high value content! You can also get updates via e-mail.
The Bottom Line: When writing your personal message be sure to tell the person who you are, how you found them, relate to them in some way, and then ask them a question to lead the conversation to the next step.